The Difference Between Living in Massachusetts & NH

Three years ago I moved from Massachusetts just a couple of towns across the border to the Seacoast area of New Hampshire.

And what have I noticed as the biggest difference between day to day living in the two states?

Well it's standing in line. That is, standing in line at a grocery store, the bank, a drug store, or at the corner gas station/mini mart. And the key word is patience.

The other day I was in a line at an Irving gas station. There was one relatively long line and two clerks. Out of nowhere a middle aged woman walked into the store and walked right up to one of the clerks to purchase a lottery ticket and a pack of cigarettes.

I was stunned. I looked around and nobody seemed to notice. The woman even chatted with the clerk for a moment or two, completed her purchase, and obliviously walked out of the store.

Now if this were to happen at any store in Mass., all hell would have broken loose. "What are you doing lady," "Get to the back of the line, b#$%#!" people would have called out.

But in NH it was as if nothing had happened. I guess people just aren't in as much of a hurry here, or they just don't want to cause a scene, or (except for the oblivious lady) they are just more polite.

After living in Mass. for 38 years I just don't get it.

Will You Watch the Sox-Less World Series?

In recent years women fans, especially in New England, have been touting themselves as being just as fervent fans as men.

Of course many old-time fans who suffered with losing Boston teams from 1918 until 2003 have looked down their noses and labeled many of these women as "band wagon jumpers." The term "pink hat fans" was coined by the media to describe women fans who sit at Fenway and in their living rooms wearing pink Red Sox hats.

Well, tonight the 2008 World Series gets underway, and I was just wondering what the ratings will be like throughout New England. How psyched are old-time Sox fans to watch the Tampa Bay Rays play the Phillies . Probably not too psyched, but I would guess that many will still stay up to watch the Series.

As for the "pink hat fans," my guess is that many of them will not even be aware that there will be a baseball game televised this evening.

Or am I just being sexist?

Check out 'Life on Mars'

There has been a lot of buzz about the AMC TV series "Mad Men," and how the show depicts the very beginnings of the changing roles of men and women. Set in the early 1960s, the show portrays unhappy wives and secretaries locked into miserable lives, and just beginning to "rebel."


If you want to watch an interesting show that takes place a decade later (precisely in 1973), check out "Life on Mars," which airs tonight (Thursdays) at 10 pm on ABC. In this show, you will see women taking the next step in the "women's movement," as the show depicts a woman on the police force, although she has far from equal status with men.

Perhaps someday a "Women's Studies" student will write a dissertation comparing the two shows, along with a 1980s show ("Hill Street Blues?") and a 1990s show ("The X-Files?") and one from this decade ("Grey's Anatomy?").

It certainly would be an interesting study of the changing roles of men and women.

A New Way To Meet Women!

Everyone knows that a great way for singles to meet one another is to take your cute puppy to a dog park.

But for the next few weeks, here's an even better idea.

Slap a big Obama button on your shirt or jacket and go shopping! My brother (who is happily married) reports that he proudly sported his over-sized Obama/Biden button at a suburban supermarket the other afternoon.

And no less than six women of all ages, (some of them very attractive, he claims) approached, smiled, and exchanged pleasantries with him. And he lives in Ohio, which is certainly not a "blue" state.

One has to wonder how he might have fared wearing a McCain/Palin button. Probably a good way to meet "Hockey Moms," don't ya think?

In Memory of a Special Woman

Saturday I attended a Memorial Service for a long-time friend and inspiration, Ruth MacDoanld of Wayland, Mass.

Ruth and I worked together many years ago, but maintained a friendship that lasted for years afterward. She had a background in education and publishing.

As I was getting ready to leave LunchDates, on several occasions I met Ruth for lunch, and as we talked about all the dating and relationship insights that I had absorbed at LunchDates, she encouraged me to write about them. And she always emphasized that I should not come across as too preachy, and to make sure that I included a light-hearted humorous tone in all of my writing.

So those of you who have enjoyed reading my columns over the years have Ruth MacDonald to thank for helping to inspire me.

You know, as we go through this journey that we call "living," there are always a handful of people that we encounter that have a special meaning in guiding us along the paths we choose.

Ruth will be missed.

My Apologies To British Readers

I received an email from a man living in France the other day in response to a column that I wrote last week that was published in the Portsmouth Herald and on the worldwide web on seacoastonline.com.

The column was headlined "From Bonking to Texting to ...." The "Bonking" referred to caveman days when a male "suitor" would club a woman over the head and drag her back to his cave.

But my European reader pointed out that in Great Britain the term "bonking" is an euphemism for sexual intercourse. He quoted a line from a movie (that happens to be one of favorites), "Love Actually." In that movie one "bloke" who has become engaged says to his fiance "Now we can bonk for real!"

So to all of my British readers I offer my sincere apologies. And a special thanks to the reader who was not offended, but just wanted to point out my "error."